Well, we survived our first week back to school after the holidays. Just barely.
Humor gets me through it all! Here, in this edition of Friday Funnies, are some moments, pictures and stories that made me laugh out loud recently.
BUSINESS ADVICE FROM KIDS
6-year-old Son: How many subscribers do you have, mom?
Me: On YouTube? I haven’t posted any videos, so zero.
Son: What about on that other thing you do?
Me: My blog? Probably 3? I don’t know. I don’t pay attention.
Son: Wow. That’s bad. That’s really bad. You should work on that.
Me: Thanks, kid.
If I ever go back to the corporate world…
(source: @leahgay on instagram)
Yep. This. All of this.
Especially back in the days when I had to wrestle kids into car seats.
I haven’t driven a car in 6 months though, so let’s just hope I remember how…
The scenario: sitting on the floor of the library reading a book about knights with my son. I’m not sure why this book prompted the following conversation, but I’ve learned to just go with the flow on these random interruptions.
Son: Jumping jacks are really good, mom.
Me: Yes, I know.
Son: Do you know why?
Me: Well, it’s good exercise…
Son: No, mom. *he sighs heavily like he can’t believe he has to explain this* Because if someone is shooting bullets at your feet, you know how to jump really good so you don’t get hit.
Me: I was going to say that too.
This is something my husband would say…
Last month we were reading a book about trains. One of the pages showed a picture similar to this one of Union Station in Colorado.
In a burst of excitement, my 6-year-old pointed to the Union Station sign and triumphantly said, “Mom! There might not be a pickled onion museum, but there’s an ONION station!”
Then I died laughing.
To his credit, the letters u-n often make the “un” sound instead of an “you-n” sound.
Watching kids practice their dance routine. If you think by the law of averages at least 2 would clap in sync with each other you'd be wrong
— Mark (@sonnyandluca) August 23, 2016
Planning a family outing is just deciding which activity will lead to the least amount of complaining from the least number of people.
— Kate Hall (@KateWhineHall) August 29, 2016
Honest to goodness, Kate Hall nailed our weekend activity planning on the head. Then, after all is said and done, whichever kid whined the most inevitably says, “that was the funnest activity EVER.”
Then I’m all, “that’s nice because we’re never leaving the house again.”
I let my kids follow their dreams, unless I already paid the registration fee on their last dream, then they follow that for 6-8 more weeks.
— Amy Dillon (@amydillon) December 15, 2016
Yep!! Just what Amy Dillon said. When I ask my kids what they enjoyed most about (insert any activity they were dying to participate in here) they inevitably say, “snack.”
I should just hand them a fruit snack every Saturday and call it good.
50% of parenting is telling people to put their pants back on.
— Jen Simon (@NoSleepInBklyn) April 21, 2016
If you’ve met my children, then you’ll know that 97.3% of my life is telling one of my kids to put their clothes back on. Don’t even get me started on the shoes.
5yo: Just one more question before I go to bed.
5yo: What are the lines on your forehead for?
5yo: Now they look angry.
— Paige Kellerman (@PaigeKellerman) March 15, 2016
I hope you had a great week filled with plenty of humor! Happy Friday the 13th, everyone!
P.S. Here are some more funny reads!